I feel like I should be thankful for every moment that I'm not too miserable to concentrate on my own thoughts. And I am! I'm incredibly grateful, but that mindfulness is hard to sustain when things don't get better.
Going Anti-Viral
My Way
I eventually snap out of it and remember: Oh hey, there's another person here, someone helping me and we're supposed to be working together. But I don't want to work together, not on things I've done alone my entire life ...
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PTSD and ME
It seems we're all on edge and looking for a fight.
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What Are You On?
I am always looking to compare treatments with fellow chronic illness sufferers. Unfortunately we have to be our own lab rats because so much is unknown about our illnesses. Below is a list of some of the medications I've tried over the years. I was thinking about adding supplements, but I'd need an entire blog... Continue Reading →
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The S-Word
I knew early on in my illness that it could last a long time -- years, maybe decades. I hoped it wouldn't, of course, but as I often do, I feared the worst. So, when faced with the daunting thought of being indefinitely sick, I made a deal with myself: If I didn't get better... Continue Reading →
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Insomnia and Other Forms of Drunkenness
... going a full day without sleep on top of having a chronic illness that already makes me feel drunk and exhausted is quite a struggle, or if we're talking about the drunken/hungover equivalent, then, well, it's quite the party. And by party I mean the BDSM kind with floggers, chains, and whips, which despite my jokes, I do not enjoy.
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Happiness is . . .
The entire time I've been sick I've wanted to be that person -- the person who brings tears of joy to dry eyes, the person who makes people believe in happy endings and the body's astonishing ability to heal itself. I wanted to be that person so bad, perhaps even more than I wanted to merely do things that healthy people do. And to a certain extent I have become that person, or rather, I was that person and now I'm having a bit of an identity crisis. What happens when you are known for battling illness, then stop recovering?
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What We‘ve got Here is a Failure to Communicate
Since many people are spending time with family members today (Thanksgiving -- US), some of whom you may disagree, I thought it would be good to write a post about every detail of my current and past political views. Just joking. I'm sure you are tired of reading about all the clashes between liberals and... Continue Reading →
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How to do the October Slide
Do you know that song The Sound of Silence? I’m sure you do, maybe it’s even your favorite song. I’ll be honest, though, I’m not much of a Simon & Garfunkel fan. Somehow, however, the song has been stuck in my head lately, probably because the lyrics are so relevant to my current situation, albeit... Continue Reading →
