I knew early on in my illness that it could last a long time -- years, maybe decades. I hoped it wouldn't, of course, but as I often do, I feared the worst. So, when faced with the daunting thought of being indefinitely sick, I made a deal with myself: If I didn't get better... Continue Reading →
... going a full day without sleep on top of having a chronic illness that already makes me feel drunk and exhausted is quite a struggle, or if we're talking about the drunken/hungover equivalent, then, well, it's quite the party. And by party I mean the BDSM kind with floggers, chains, and whips, which despite my jokes, I do not enjoy.
Do you know that song The Sound of Silence? I’m sure you do, maybe it’s even your favorite song. I’ll be honest, though, I’m not much of a Simon & Garfunkel fan. Somehow, however, the song has been stuck in my head lately, probably because the lyrics are so relevant to my current situation, albeit... Continue Reading →
She is short and slender, yet I have seen both large men and imposing women crumble under her tenacity.
The truth is I don’t want to remember that feeling because I know the only way I can truly remember it is if I become that sick again.
A version of this essay was first published by Men’s Journal in 2016. After kissing me for a few minutes, Laura, my ex-girlfriend, pulls her top down and lets me feel and kiss her breasts. I am so excited and nervous I almost enter an apoplectic state. It is a moment of rapid heartbeats and... Continue Reading →
If a doctor drives an Audi and pays $4,000 a month for a big house while a patient can't afford a single appointment with that doctor because he/she charges $500 and doesn't accept health insurance, then sorry (I'm not sorry), he/she should have his/her medical license taken away.
"When your own life is threatened, your sense of empathy is blunted by a terrible, selfish hunger for survival." - Yann Martel (Life of Pi) Lately I've been reflecting on the ups and downs of having a chronic illness -- in my case, two illnesses, myalgic encephalomyelitis (chronic fatigue syndrome) and Lyme disease. Mostly I've... Continue Reading →
Now that there is finally some scientific answers coming our way, we might actually have the luxury of not using each other as guinea pigs. But we may also be faced with being separated by the very answers we have sought for such an incredibly long time. And, regardless of its impact on our relationships, we may be more different than we originally thought.